ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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