Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
