that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize
