Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
