im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
he high fived his dick after we had sex
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
