Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
