I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize