No awkward lesbian experiences without me
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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