I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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