I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Randomize
