ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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