What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
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