If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
3 2 1 whiskey
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Randomize