I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Someone signed my nipple.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
