Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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