You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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