What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I just saw a hot homeless man
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize