i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
