Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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