are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
