Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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