I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
one might say we're banned from that church
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
