smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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