I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
