dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
