We're facebook friends in real life
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
