is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
