So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Screwed.edu
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
