I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
