Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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