Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
