It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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