that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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