evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
