This girl is more easily done than said...
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
