the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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