I want to have your abortion
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
