oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize