Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
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