this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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