I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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