I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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