I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
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