He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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