You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
