Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
