Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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