Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Randomize
