i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
