My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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