yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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