Cold hands, warm shart.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Randomize